Billy Bullock stood by the registers flirting with two short, thin blonde cashiers he worked with at Mega-Mart in Valparaiso, Indiana. He was an ordinary average guy with short, black hair and a medium build. He wasn’t handsome, but he wasn’t ugly either. Using his flirtation techniques learned from a webinar he watched on YouTube, he was able to successfully flirt his way into a date with any hot, skinny girl he desired. Amelie and Lana were the latest two girls he was working on.
Heidi, an overweight gypsy with short black hair, watched him work his magic on the two blonde cashiers in a silent jealous rage. She worked in the courtesy booth and had been in love with Billy for years. He never paid her any attention, because she was way below his standards. She wasn’t skinny nor a dimwit like the girls he normally dated.
Her gypsy friends told her to forget about him and find a guy who would appreciate her for what she had to offer in a relationship. She wanted to settle down and get married. She didn’t care what they said; she wanted Billy and no one else.
Her eyes followed Billy as he walked away from the cashiers to stock some shelves. As the desire for him increased, her jealousy toward the other cashiers did as well. She closed her eyes and imagined he was Christian Grey, and she was Anastasia Steele involved in a strange erotic relationship with her tending to his every dark sexual desire.
“Heidi, you’re drooling,” Lana shouted knocking her out of her daydream. “Thinking about the new Hostess snack cakes?”
“Go to hell!”
“She sure gets testy when she’s hungry,” Lana joked, causing Amelie to giggle.
Heidi shot daggers at them with her eyes. They will pay for their insolence! I will make sure of it!
After her shift ended, Heidi purchased some groceries and pushed her cart over to Lana’s line. Lana gave her a dirty look as she watched Heidi place all of her groceries on the conveyor belt.
“Heidi, you did leave some food on the shelves? Other people on the planet need to eat too.”
Amelie laughed hysterically.
Heidi forcibly grabbed Lana’s arm and chanted “BALDING!”
Lana gave her a dirty look and burst into laughter.
Heidi spun around and forcibly grabbed Amelie’s arm as well. “ACNE!”
“Acne on my flawless skin. You have to be joking.”
Heidi flicked her off and stormed out of the grocery store leaving her groceries behind. She tried to hold back her tears. She had never been so insulted before. The two girls deserved the gypsy curses she just placed upon them.
Standing by his red sports car was Billy smoking a cigarette. She angrily ran over to him. “What do you see in those two airheads? I’m the one who loves you, not them. I can fulfill your sexual desires better than either of those two imbeciles.”
Billy stared at her for a few minutes and then smiled. In a very sarcastic manner, he said. “I’m not into charity work.”
She grabbed his arm forcefully and chanted, “FATTER!” She stormed away leaving him in a state of confusion.
Billy awoke the next morning to sounds of his stomach growling loudly. Normally, he awoke each morning feeling completely refreshed and ready to start a new day. Today, his back was aching as he struggled to pull himself out of bed. He slowly walked toward the bathroom. He walked over to the toilet to relieve himself. He looked down and to his surprise he could no longer see his feet or his favorite appendage. All he could see was a fat gut.
He walked over to his digital scale and weighed himself ─ 285 pounds. He had gained over a hundred pounds overnight. He looked at his reflection in the mirror. It looked nothing like his normal reflection. Standing before him was the image of a grotesque fat man. He possessed no thick grey beard, so he wasn’t turning into Santa Claus like Tim Allen did in his favorite holiday movie.
His stomached growled loudly.
“I guess a few donuts couldn’t hurt.”
He walked into his kitchen and opened the fridge. As if he had lost complete control over his appetite, he ate everything that was his in fridge. He slowly walked into the living room feeling sick to his stomach and fell asleep in his favorite chair.
The blinding sunlight peeking through her curtains added to the massive headache Lana had from a hangover. She and Amelie had gotten drunk after work, and she had no recollection of how she made it home. She was freezing, especially her ears and head. She grabbed her robe and put it over her naked body and walked into the bathroom. She screamed as she saw her image in the mirror. The once flowing blonde hair that drew every man’s attention was completely gone replaced with nothingness. She touched her bald scalp with her hands and only felt skin, no hair. She ran into her bedroom and saw her pillow covered with her hair. She grabbed the hair and slammed it on her head and watched as it slid off, falling to the floor.
She fell to her knees and cried. A few minutes later, she stood up and walked to the mirror. She stared at her reflections for several minutes deciding what she should do. There wasn’t an excuse for a teenage girl to be bald unless she was a cancer patient. She knew there was only one course of action to take. She stormed out of her bedroom and into her dad’s bedroom. She opened his top dresser drawer and pulled out his handgun. She stared at it for a few seconds, then put it in her mouth and pulled the trigger.
Amelie felt like something heavy was pushing down on her face as she slowly awoke. She was having a hard time breathing. She put her right hand on her face and felt a liquidly substance oozing out of her face. She walked in a hunched-like manner toward the bathroom. Whatever was on her face was so heavy she could barely lift her head. She looked in the mirror and screamed.
She had huge zits on her face the size of softballs with whitecaps the size of gumdrops. They were pulsating violently as if they were ready to pop. The pain increased and before she could scream again, they all popped showering her mirror with puss and her blood. She fell forward and slid down the wall bleeding out. In a large pool of puss and blood, she died painfully.
Billy walked into Mega-Mart with an empty cart and a large appetite. He had eaten everything in his apartment, and fortunately he possessed a two hundred dollar gift card that Mega-Mart gave their employees for Christmas burning a hole in his pocket that he could use to purchase more food.
All the cashiers and baggers were crying. His manager, Karen, was trying to console them.
“Two of our cashiers were found dead this morning,” Karen answered.
“Not Lana and Amelie?”
“Did you know them?” Karen asked, not recognizing the obese man standing before her.
“Karen, it’s me Billy.”
She looked at him confused.
“It can’t be,” she said a few seconds later seeing the resemblance in his face.
“It’s a long story. Where’s Heidi?”
“She’s on break.”
Billy waddled down past produce toward the atrium where Heidi always took her break. She had a huge smile on her face when she saw how fat he had gotten.
“What did you do?” He yelled.
“You all got what you had coming. Lana, Amelie and you deserve your fates. You are going to get fatter and fatter. So fat that Jabba the Hutt is going to say ‘Damn, that man is fat.’ You will continue to get fatter until you explode.”
“Make it stop. Please, I beg you.”
“Now why would I do that?”
“Because you love me. If you reverse this, I’ll give you all the love you desire. I promise.”
She thought about his proposal for a minute and responded. “Meet me at the park tonight. There is going to be a full moon tonight and I find that very romantic.”
“Fine, I’ll see you tonight.”
Billy sat on the park bench by the entrance to the park waiting impatiently for Heidi to arrive. She walked into the park holding a square package and sat down next to him. She stared up at the full moon and then at Billy. She handed the package to him.
“Open it,” she ordered.
Inside the package was a pumpkin pie.
“To stop the weight gain, you want me to eat this pie?”
“There are two ways to end the curse. Eat the pie and then die instantly before you gain too much weight and explode or feed it to a stranger who will die instantly, and you will then return to your original weight. I suggest eating the pie yourself and die with dignity.”
“I can feed this to anybody?”
“Yes, that is how it works.”
“Sounds simply enough,” Billy said and scooped a handful of the pie out of the package with one hand and forcefully grabbed Heidi’s face with the other. “This is for Lana and Amelie!” He forcefully shoved the pie down her throat. He grabbed some more and shoved that down her throat. She fought to free herself as he continued. When there was almost no more pie for him to shove into her throat, his big stomach quickly disappeared returning him to his original weight.
With the last of her fading strength and remaining breath, she grabbed his arm and chanted, “IMPOTENCE!”